Many parents-to-be feel excited about their baby's arrival, but being a parent can be intimidating. Some people who have children later in life may have prepared themselves for the challenges. But many new parents worry that raising a child will be too stressful.
Some parents go through different emotions before their baby arrives. Some parents may think, "I wonder if I can handle this." Others may think, "I don't want to do this. I have other plans."
Some parents may worry that they will not know how to do everything well enough. All these fears can cause a parent-to-be to feel overwhelmed or anxious.
The good news is that most parents find that parenting can be rewarding and even exciting. Parenting involves a lot of hard work, but being a parent is also a wonderful thing. It can be challenging at times, but it's an important role.
What common fears do potential parents face? Consider these:
Your child will not be successful. Some parents worry that they will be unable to raise their child right, that their child will have problems, or they won't make their child happy.
The truth is that parenting requires plenty of effort, but the results are well worth it. Most parents report that raising their children is very rewarding, and they feel happy that they faced their fears.
Someone will attack your child. Expectant parents may worry that their child will get teased, bullied, or abused. The good news is that although bullying is quite common at school, most children do very well in school and grow up to be healthy, happy adults.
And parents can help train their children to deal with bullying and stand up for themselves. The media also intensifies those fears with their reports. But remember that those news items are usually rare, and there's little chance your child will encounter an attack.
Your child might get injured in a car accident. In reality, many accidents occur every year, but most are not severe. Parents can try to keep their children safe. They can also drive responsibly. But accidents can happen anywhere and anytime.
Your child might not excel in sports or school. This fear comes from the media's coverage of high-profile athletes or people who become successful despite their disorders. The truth is that such people are rare.
True, many children and teens excel and are happy in athletics and school. But the reverse is also true. People with average athletic ability and average intelligence also succeed in life. They might have to work a little more, but they do it all the time.
Feeling like you're not good enough for parenthood. In this digital age, parenting has become quite competitive. Many parents want to be the best parent they can be, which can sometimes cause them to feel inadequate.
You might even feel this way yourself, which is why it's important to remember that having a healthy relationship with your children is more important than anything else.
Posts on social media showing other "great" parents might not even be true and only serve to make you feel worse about yourself.
Fear that you might need to have a C-section. A parent-to-be who fears surgery is understandably nervous, but keep in mind that doctors perform millions of C-sections every year, and it's a highly safe procedure. And even then, you’ll only need one if certain conditions occur. If you feel strongly against surgery, it is recommended to educate yourself and hire a birth doula who can help you plan the birth that YOU want to have.
Others might not see your child as good enough. Sometimes preconceived ideas and stereotypes about your child's race, ethnicity, or disability can color people's view of them. Other people's preconceived notions about your child will often have nothing to do with his abilities.
That's why you shouldn't take what others think to heart. Also, you might be wrong, and others might think highly of your child.
Remember that many people feel nervous or uncomfortable before they have a child. But those feelings don't last forever. When you're a parent, you'll love your child and enjoy raising them. And that's all that matters.
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